Emotional wounds are like invisible scars left by life. You can’t see them, but you feel them— in the way you pull back, in the way you cling to others, in how you lose trust, or how you fear love. Some wounds heal quickly. Others stay open, festering, affecting everything you do and everyone you meet.

The term “emotional wounds” became popular because it resonates with us. It’s easier to understand ourselves when we have an explanation. Lise Bourbeau talks about five major emotional wounds, but there’s no official, universal list. There’s no single rulebook for suffering—just people with unhealed pain.

Do You Recognize Yourself in Any of These?

Rejection – Ever felt unwanted, like you’re too much or not enough? Like there’s no place for you? This wound makes you want to hide, become invisible, to never cause a fuss.

Abandonment – Have you ever felt utterly alone, even in a crowd? Like no matter how much you give, someone will always leave? This wound makes you hold on tightly, begging for love, settling for scraps. It feels like it’s better to have something than nothing, right?

Humiliation – Have you ever been so embarrassed that you just wanted to disappear? Feeling like you’re broken or a joke? People with this wound often put themselves last, apologizing for taking up space in the world.

Betrayal – Has someone ever promised to stay but left anyway? Told you you were safe, only to break your trust? This wound makes it hard to trust anyone. It’s easier to keep your guard up and rely on no one.

Injustice – Ever felt like no matter how hard you work, you’re overlooked? Like someone else gets credit for what you’ve done? This wound creates perfectionists—people who are always proving themselves, trying to be seen, trying to be heard.

We All Have Wounds. The Real Question Is: How Much Do They Hurt?

If you recognize these wounds, it doesn’t necessarily mean they’re still affecting you. Yes, they were there once, but perhaps your life is free of their hold now. However, if these wounds still shape your decisions, influence your relationships, or weigh on your soul, they aren’t just old scars—they’re chains.

In my view, there are more than just five wounds. A wound can be anything—something that’s been present in your life for a long time or a single event that was too intense or overwhelming.

Take, for example, what I often see in my country: “the poverty wound”. Unfortunately, not many specialists talk about it. People who grew up in poverty, even if they are financially stable now, often carry that pain with them. They may constantly worry about money , obsess over prices and discounts , or struggle to spend on things that could improve their lives. They might also be overly cautious, fearing that others will take advantage of them financially.

Psychology discusses attachment, relational trauma, and how the past influences the present. But the label doesn’t matter that much. What really matters is whether that old pain is still running your life.

Knowing what wound you carry isn’t enough. What matters is what you do with it. Because if we don’t heal, we continue to live as wounded people—and wounded people tend to wound others…